When our 4 kids were little, they would get up from the dinner table and head to a room we called the toy room. It was in the toy room that they played games with one another, but it was also the place where they wrestled, fought and generally terrorized one another while my wife and I tried to finish our dinner. As they wrestled each other, we sat there wrestling with what to do. We wanted to charge up the stairs, put an end to their fighting and command them to love each other. We wanted our kids to love their siblings but we weren’t sure how to accomplish that. How do you make someone love someone else?
I wonder if God was wrestling with that in today’s text when he commanded us to love one another. 1st John 3:23 And this is his commandment, that we should believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ and love one another, just as he has commanded us. I wonder if God has long wanted to charge up the stairs and demand that we stop fighting and start loving. I wonder if he wants to make us stop carrying around anger, resentment and irritation towards people who drives us nuts. I imagine that he does, and yet, for some reason God allows us to wrestle, fight and generally terrorize one another. Why? When I read God’s command to love, I wonder if it’s similar to our experience with our kids. I think perhaps they needed to have the freedom to grow into the love we wanted from them. We did everything we could to help foster it but at some point, we had to release our control of it. We had to trust that they would discover how good and pleasing it would be to develop loving relationships with one another.
I think God’s commandments are similar in that he will not force them upon us. There are hundreds of commandments in the Old and New Testaments; laws by which to live, calling us into harmony with God, self and neighbor. And yet God’s commands are more invitations than demands. God is inviting us to discover that life is more fulfilling, blessed and abundant when we follow his commandments by choice rather being forced into it.
I’m going to close today by asking you to do something a little uncomfortable; think of the person you struggle to love the most: A colleague, student, family member, even a friend. God’s command to love extends to them but he will not force it upon us. God knows that love is always the better option; that it would be far better for us to love rather than hate them, but he gives us time to get there on our own. Like 4 kids wrestling after dinner, sometimes it’ll be loud, messy and chaotic and yet God’s command assures us that it’s a far better workplace, home, neighborhood and toy room when we stop fighting and start loving. This week, may we look for a way to love the people we struggle to love the most.
